Strength Training for Adversity
The life of a graduate student is ripe with opportunities to practice resilience (Look at that optimism!). High stress levels and exhaustion from heavy workloads can be overwhelming, and I was in desperate need of a mental boost. So, I embarked on another resilience experiment: a week of using my strengths. Research shows that using our strengths can positively impact many areas of our life, including happiness, relationships, and stress levels (Gohar, 2021). I selected two of my own strengths for a week of inner strength training.
First, I decided to work on my appreciation of beauty. This activity offered some peace when I felt like a bird trying to fly on the Fourth of July. I was determined to resurrect my neglected habit of walking every morning. I threw on my coat, leashed my crazy dog, and entered a world that took me out of my own. The crisp autumn leaves in the chill November air were frosted jewels just waiting to be discovered. Research shows that cultivating a sense of awe nourishes a smaller sense of self and connection to the larger picture (Piff, et al., 2015). Appreciation of beauty is considered a transcendent strength: it allows you to rise above the individual realm and its struggles. I noticed that each step took me a little further from the incessant din of mental chatter in my own mind.
Chilly morning walks
Another strength that I worked on was zest. Zest can be defined as “approaching life with excitement and energy” (Peterson and Seligman, 2004). This was a strength that I felt disconnected from lately, probably due to the previously referenced fatigue. Luckily, I had the perfect arena for enacting zest: motherhood. Every day, I set aside time to dive into life with my kids. The activities were directed by my children; my job was just to be present—to be fully present. Surprisingly, it actually increased my energy—an effect supported by research (Gohar, 2021). I felt more alive, and I remembered what I loved most about living…
One day, I threw on my coat to take the dog on a walk with my son and my partner. Putting on my best zest face, I challenged them to a race. We took off to try to beat the dog, an impossible task that left us laughing hysterically. I turned back to my partner, who had been left in the dust. “That,” he said emphatically, “is the meaning of life.” All I had to do was run across the street to reconnect with what made my life worth living—embracing life with those I love deeply. Ultimately, finding meaning is an essential element to well-being (Seligman, 2012). I gained clarity on what meant the most to me, and I felt more whole and happy as a result.
Racing trains
In the end, I realized I became disconnected from my core strengths during times of stress. I also realized how healing it felt to engage with them again. It made me think “Oh, right. This is who I am.” They hadn’t disappeared; they were just waiting for me to dust them off a bit. Using our strengths can help us reconnect with our true selves (Gohar). Moving forward, I hope to make it a daily habit to notice strengths that I am enacting, as well as structure activities that purposefully engage them.
What are your strengths? Take the strength quiz to identify your top strengths. Then, check out this link to get some ideas for engaging these strengths in your own life. With a little strength training, we can increase our ability to overcome adversity.
References:
Gohar, D. (2021, October 26). Character strengths for resilience [online lecture].
Peterson, C., & Seligman, M. E. (2004). Character strengths and virtues: A handbook and classification (Vol. 1). Oxford University Press.
Piff, P. K., Dietze, P., Feinberg, M., Stancato, D. M., & Keltner, D. (2015). Awe, the small self, and prosocial behavior. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 108(6), 883–899. https://doi.org/10.1037/pspi0000018
Seligman, M. E. (2012). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. Simon and Schuster.
